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"Being raised in a violent home made Alesa's life a living hell. After the disappearance of her entire family, it offered Alesa a chance at a new life...little did she know that the new path she would walk would plummet her into a scarred, traumatizing life that would shape who she became and how she lived for the rest of her days."

'Red' Alesa Nyx

  • Doesn't Give up Easily

  • Thinks Irrationally at times

  • Has a Really Bad Temper

  • Traumatized upbringing

History

          I grew up in a cold world. My Father was a preacher and my mother was a whore... I was the youngest girl

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amongst 4 siblings.. two sisters and two brothers. My father... he may have been a preacher out in the world to the people but at home... he beat all of us kids while mom sat there and laughed.. Growing up wasn't the easiest, I had to learn how to defend myself by the age of ten just to survive.. Everyday was a constant battle, my mom was always gone... sleeping with everyone in sight for money. My dad? well.. he was at church flirting with the women. When they both weren't home was the best time of my life...There was no violence...no screaming....just a home to be safe in for once.

I spent time trying to learn how to draw. I'd draw everything from trees to squirrels and other little animals that would come around our yard. I would have the biggest smile on my face at times...just so much peace and quiet...I didn't have to worry about how much pain I would have to endure..how much screaming I would have to hear...my 2 brothers go it worse than us girls but not by much..we often looked at each other more like prisoners as apposed to relatives...time was spent hiding and defending ourselves rather than playing....When I turned 13 I went on a little trip by myself I needed an escape the amount of time i'd spent gone would more than likely go unnoticed...I planned on doing something like this..

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even if it was just for a little while. I packed up my little kit and walked for hours.. I found this little abandoned camp site out by the Dakota river. I set up my bed roll into the tent and just watched the river flow and the trains go by. I thought about where those trains go or where the river lead to... they couldn’t possibly be places worse than here...All i could think about was the idea of there being so much more out there in the world..even if i’ve never seen any of it for myself. After awhile I went to sleep..it was peaceful... I was gone for about 3 to 4 days just being myself and unafraid...I grew to cherish those solo 4

days before I decided to head back home... When I got home everyone was gone, the house looked torn apart like someone or some people were there that shouldn’t have been. Did my family just pack up and leave..? I looked around my house to see if I could find anything that would tell me where they went, I found nothing. I went into my room that I shared with my sisters and started packing some clothes and other stuff I needed and cared about.. I was scared and confused...I had no idea where I was gonna go or what I was gonna do..but i knew how to learn...I knew how to fight..and I knew how to survive. I grabbed my machete that I stole off from a wagon while a lady was sleeping and I left the house. I was walking for I don't know how long... it was a dry hot day that i’ll never forget...I was

tired. I couldn’t carry all the stuff i brought with me so I had to let go of most of it that was weighing me down. Iwas alone..scared..and crying..but my feet kept moving forward..They wouldn’t stop no matter how I felt in the moment. I had to keep going... I had to survive..Even if it was fear and uncertainty that was driving me...

"You Don't choose the path you're given in this life. It chooses you...and tells you to get walkin."

-Red

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     I finally made it into a town i’d never seen before and looked for the general store. I had no money but that wasn't going to stop me from getting the stuff that I needed. I asked around and a young woman walked me there, I thanked her and walked inside. While the clerk wasn't looking I stole some food and ran out but he caught up with me and grabbed the back of my shirt. I looked down still holding the food I stole and he turned me around.. next thing I know he smacked the apples out of my hands onto the ground and roughly tried dragging me to the sheriff. I grabbed my machete and hit his arm with it. He let go pretty quickly but screamed and got everyone's attention. I just ran, looking for a way out of there. The town was packed... i felt like all eyes were on me at this point..

I kept bumping into people trying to leave but someone grabbed me and yelled,"I got her!" I bit his hand hard enough that I could taste iron.. he let me go but he back handed me and yelled "You little bitch!" so instead of trying to reason with this guy I just swung my machete at him as hard as I could and hit him in the side of his neck. His blood got all over my face I dropped my machete and wiped my face off with my sleeve. I heard the sheriff searching around looking for me, I was hiding behind the local hotel when I found this beautiful horse so I decided to steal it. I vaguely remembered how to ride but I had law after me so I just kicked my foot back and hoped for the best. I got out of town but now I had a horse I didn't know how to take care of.. After I finally felt that I was in the clear I hopped off the horse but fell on the ground. I was hurt..but I felt alive..I had never felt such energy around other people. I was too distracted by what had just happened to worry about what may happen later. I felt accomplished..alive..laying there on my back staring up at the blue sky..I think I may have even smiled. I got up and dusted myself off and then decided to search through the saddle bags. I found ten dollars, Jerky, an apple, water, and a can of peaches..camping equipment, the works. There was a number of different interesting items on the saddle as well. A locket, a journal with some really nice drawings..I mean really, the owner of this horse was a true artist. Some really small wood carvings, herbs & seeds treats for the horse.  I just sighed in relief that I wasn't going to starve that night... after I ate I made myself a temporary camp and hitched my new horse to a tree. It was the first time in my life I was on my own and felt like I could take care of myself..that I was gonna be alright.

horse.I put up a fight but next thing I knew everything went black.. when I finally woke up I was inside a tent on someone's cot. I got up and walked out to see these women all around the campfire. They looked over at me when I stepped on a twig.. A woman who's name I come to find out is Edith Jones said to me "finally time you woke up" I looked up at her and asked "who are you guys and why am I here?". She looked at the other ladies that were around the campfire "We call our selves the sisterhood, and you’re a child.. you shouldn't be alone. Come on over to the fire and get warm and have some supper." These ladies had a huge camp..It was clear they had spent a lot of time stealing from other people. They had men's clothes, jackets, and weapons stockpiled..They had seats with cushions and gold trimmed furniture..The camp was well lit and there was so much space for every one of them. They each had their own tents which housed even more knick knacks and valueables..It was clear these ladies had a lot...and had done a lot to get it. They sat pretty on their piles of supplies that must've took time to get.

           That night while I was sleeping I heard a bunch of Horse hoofs approaching my camp so naturally I grabbed my machete ready to kill anyone who came near me. Suddenly these five women came into view. I pointed my machete at them and asked them "what do you want?". They didn't say anything at first but just looked at each other. They said a couple of words I couldn't make out considering I had just woken up. Suddenly I felt my arms being grabbed and I'm being forced on top of someone's

 I just followed her over to the rest of the girls. I sat down on a log away from the five of them. Edith offered me some deer meat and I was hungry so I ate it pretty quick. I looked at Edith and asked "how long was i out" she just laughed  and said "a couple of hours" I just nodded..I didn’t really know what to say, I just kept looking around at them.. I was intimidated...These women looked like they had seen enough things for two lifetimes.. The looks and scars they carried told their own stories. I wondered if these women were like me..lost in the world until they found each other. Having to do whatever it took to keep each other safe...like a family. They went around the fire and told stories about themselves so I could better know them..They talked about how they met each other..some of the things they’ve stolen..some of the places they’ve been...some of the people they’ve killed and why...They clearly knew how to protect themselves and they were friendly with me so I decided to stay by these women’s side... Edith...She seemed to be the leader of these women based on how she commanded attention and respect among all of them..When she talked, they listened. That’s what my instincts told me at least.. I’ve always tried to do my best to pay attention to whats happening around me and what’s being said.. I noticed a lot of problems with my parents was mainly because they didn't even pay attention to each other..

-Red

           I was with these girls for 3 years cause I had nobody, no home, nothing..I had no where to go... no one who cared about me other than the sisterhood..I felt like I owed them my life. I had no idea what I could’ve ran into out there without them...and I never realized it until some of the situations we found ourselves in over time...They realized I was quick thinking and followed direction well. They would draw up a plan...and i’d make it better. I was relentless in my pursuit of acceptance and belonging. I was never afraid to go all in...Always looking to maximize the outcome in our favor...regardless of the odds. I think what gave me the strength to stand out among the rest was the fact that I had nothing to lose...some of these girls still had families that they’d write to.. always concerned about the different risks...I couldn’t care less..All that mattered to me was doing what Edith wanted done. I worked hard to be someone she admired, respected and could trust..all at such a young age. After awhile of sticking with them I became Edith's most trusted... I was the girl that was sent to do her dirty work..she always knew she could count on me to do exactly what she wanted done...A lot of the other girls sometimes hesitated before going in...there was always big risk to most of the things Edith wanted us to do.crazy things.

I wouldn't hesitate..she knew i looked up to her..she

knew I wanted her acceptance and to make her proud of me.

...she took advantage of that...I remember one girl

the sweetest thing...just a few years older than me with a

stubborn heart of gold....

and ask questions..she asked a lot

of questions....she didn't

really like some of the decisions she

saw Edith making over time...

I would come back to camp on

mellow quiet nights and hear her and

Edith going back and forth...

Edith had me strangle her to death

with my bare hands while she looked

over my shoulder as I did it...

I'll never forget that sweet girl's face.

..the more I saw that look on her..the

I do these things with a fragile heart...   when I suffer, i become stronger.

faster i just wanted it to be over...she struggled hard...it wasn’t quick...I’ll never forget that face....Haley McCourt....such an innocent person...after doing something like that Edith would always grab my face, pull me in close... and look me deep into my eyes...Almost as if she was feeling..or taking my energy or something..A look of reassurance and acceptance of my actions.. It always felt like she was looking into my soul with admiration...she was so proud of me....Always “so proud”... I didn’t want that girl to die.....  I've killed so many people... I don't remember all their names... all because of her.. Haley McCourt was one of many that i'll never forget.. I remember her more than my own family..

always wanting to help